It's okay to acknowledge that sometimes you are overwhelmed. As you will see below, even Mother Teresa felt that way.
"I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once."
Erma Bombeck
"Have you ever felt that even though you're taking things "one day at a time" it's about 24 hours more than you can take?"
Barbara Johnson
"I know God won't give me anything I cannot handle. Sometimes I just wish that he did not trust me so much."
Mother Teresa
"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on."
Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Sometimes the only thing in life that makes sense is chocolate."
Unknown
"Every failure, obstacle or hardship is an opportunity in disguise. Success in many cases is failure turned inside out. The greatest pollution problem we face today is negativity. Eliminate the negative attitude and believe you can do anything. Replace "If I can, I hope, maybe" with I can, I will, I must."
Mary Kay
"When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place."
Unknown
Tuesday
Flatulence is a fancy word for gas.
Chemotherapy often disrupts digestion contributing to abdominal pain, cramping and flatulence. Breathe deeply and try to relax when you experience stomach cramps or get gas.
You need to know it is also okay to burp or fart. It will release pressure and you will feel so much better afterwards. Don't try to hold it in. Normally burps and farts are not socially acceptable. Acceptable or not let it rip! You can always excuse yourself politely afterwards. It isn't good for your health to keep the gas bottled up inside.
There are things you can do to help ease the cramps, pain and build-up of gas. Take your medication with a little food unless you have been specifically instructed to take it on an empty stomach. Don't smoke or drink alcohol as both can irritate your stomach. Avoid spicy, sugary sweet, or greasy fried foods. Slowly eat small meals throughout the day instead of gulping down a couple of large ones. Take note of what works. Identifying what makes the situation better or worse is a "trial and error" process.
Please contact your doctor if your abdomen swells suddenly and feels rigid. Or if you have severe pain or incessant cramping. Or if there is blood in your vomit or stools. It is important that you keep an on-going dialogue with your medical team. The information here and on other websites should only compliment the information you are receiving from the medical team who knows your specific case history and circumstance.
I confess I was concerned that when my chemo treatments were over burping and farting may have become second nature to me and I would lose all sense of decorum and etiquette. Happily that isn't the case. I am in control now just as I ever was. The gas pain is gone. My digestion is improving everyday. Of course, I am human so there is the occasional oops!
If you're a female reading this, let me add that you may find that the men in your life will smile with pride when you "trumpet". Strange but true. I can't explain it. I think it is a guy thing. If you are a man reading this, please recognize that although I encourage you to release your gas build-up from your cancer treatments, I'm not suggesting you have carte' blanche to cut loose forever and ever (smile).
You need to know it is also okay to burp or fart. It will release pressure and you will feel so much better afterwards. Don't try to hold it in. Normally burps and farts are not socially acceptable. Acceptable or not let it rip! You can always excuse yourself politely afterwards. It isn't good for your health to keep the gas bottled up inside.
There are things you can do to help ease the cramps, pain and build-up of gas. Take your medication with a little food unless you have been specifically instructed to take it on an empty stomach. Don't smoke or drink alcohol as both can irritate your stomach. Avoid spicy, sugary sweet, or greasy fried foods. Slowly eat small meals throughout the day instead of gulping down a couple of large ones. Take note of what works. Identifying what makes the situation better or worse is a "trial and error" process.
Please contact your doctor if your abdomen swells suddenly and feels rigid. Or if you have severe pain or incessant cramping. Or if there is blood in your vomit or stools. It is important that you keep an on-going dialogue with your medical team. The information here and on other websites should only compliment the information you are receiving from the medical team who knows your specific case history and circumstance.
I confess I was concerned that when my chemo treatments were over burping and farting may have become second nature to me and I would lose all sense of decorum and etiquette. Happily that isn't the case. I am in control now just as I ever was. The gas pain is gone. My digestion is improving everyday. Of course, I am human so there is the occasional oops!
If you're a female reading this, let me add that you may find that the men in your life will smile with pride when you "trumpet". Strange but true. I can't explain it. I think it is a guy thing. If you are a man reading this, please recognize that although I encourage you to release your gas build-up from your cancer treatments, I'm not suggesting you have carte' blanche to cut loose forever and ever (smile).
Wake up in gratitude.
Great advice from Joel Osteen: "How you wake up in the morning sets the tone for the whole day. Find something to be thankful for. Remind yourself that you are equipped to do what you need to do."
You may be going through tremendous challenges, and you get tempted to think "I'll never get through this. Things are never going to get better than they are today." That is when it is most important to remind yourself of the things for which you are most thankful. You need to reject the temptation to be overcome by negative thoughts and trust things will change in your favor.
There really is a silver lining to every cloud. It is just extremely hard to find it sometimes. Wake up in gratitude and you will have a head start.
You may be going through tremendous challenges, and you get tempted to think "I'll never get through this. Things are never going to get better than they are today." That is when it is most important to remind yourself of the things for which you are most thankful. You need to reject the temptation to be overcome by negative thoughts and trust things will change in your favor.
There really is a silver lining to every cloud. It is just extremely hard to find it sometimes. Wake up in gratitude and you will have a head start.
Sunday
Alleviate the metallic taste.
A metallic taste is sometimes a side effect brought on from your chemotherapy treatments. You may find relief by using plastic ware instead of your usual fork or spoons. Chewing gum or sucking on lifesavers may help.
I was introduced to a wonderful little mint that helped me tremendously. Not only did it help eliminate the metallic taste it also soothed my digestion. They are called "Angel Mints". It is a name that describes them accurately.
When I first heard of them I was apprehensive. It was said that they had the ability to calm digestive problems, relieve nausea, eliminate a metallic taste and even help with symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome. Recently they have even been recommended to help ease anxiety.
I am not a doctor, nor do I have any vested interest in the company that makes and sells these wonderful melt-in-your-mouth mints. I simply want to share that they exist and they helped me and others who have enjoyed them. They are truly delicious as well as helping to alleviate and remedy a variety of problems.
They are available at the Florida Candy Factory, Inc. located in Clearwater, Florida and can be ordered from their site. http://www.angelmint.com/home.html Some Walgreens are currently selling them. Even some hospital gift shops have them for sale. The Candy Factory is family owned and is proud of their product. I found these mints to be refreshing, tasty and helped me combat my digestive challenges, nausea and metal tasting mouth. Maybe they would help you too.
I was introduced to a wonderful little mint that helped me tremendously. Not only did it help eliminate the metallic taste it also soothed my digestion. They are called "Angel Mints". It is a name that describes them accurately.
When I first heard of them I was apprehensive. It was said that they had the ability to calm digestive problems, relieve nausea, eliminate a metallic taste and even help with symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome. Recently they have even been recommended to help ease anxiety.
I am not a doctor, nor do I have any vested interest in the company that makes and sells these wonderful melt-in-your-mouth mints. I simply want to share that they exist and they helped me and others who have enjoyed them. They are truly delicious as well as helping to alleviate and remedy a variety of problems.
They are available at the Florida Candy Factory, Inc. located in Clearwater, Florida and can be ordered from their site. http://www.angelmint.com/home.html Some Walgreens are currently selling them. Even some hospital gift shops have them for sale. The Candy Factory is family owned and is proud of their product. I found these mints to be refreshing, tasty and helped me combat my digestive challenges, nausea and metal tasting mouth. Maybe they would help you too.
Wednesday
Being an armchair quarterback isn't the exclusive domain of football fans.
arm·chair quar·ter·back (plural arm·chair quar·ter·backs) MSN's Definition:
1. viewer who criticizes conduct of games: somebody who is certain that he or she can make better calls than the coaches or players while watching a competitive sport on television
2. giver of unwanted advice: somebody who offers unwanted advice about how to do something or tries to supervise an activity without being asked
No matter what the circumstance there are always people ready to share their opinion, to criticise and give unwanted advice. It is okay to listen if you want. You can give their suggestions consideration. However you don't need to take it.
All too often advice is based on only having "some" of the facts. Sometimes it is based on information that is old. Although research hasn't yet determined what causes various cancers or how to cure them, the advancements in medical research is phenomenal and occurring everyday. You need to make decisions based on what makes you feel most confident. Whether you follow a doctor's guidance or choose a holistic approach or combination, the choice is yours.
You will make yourself stressed (not a healthy thing) if you try to please others. Don't let yourself be guilted in to trying something you prefer not to do. People may have the best of intentions but they are only making assessments based on their own experience or research.
Hindsight is said to be 20 x 20. That is because they are viewing things that have already happened. It is easy to play the "woulda, shoulda" game from that perspective. In treating your cancer you need to be looking forward. The past may hold useful information however it is what your options are today that need to be considered so you have a healthy, happy tomorrow.
Sometimes it would be nice if we could be covered with a Teflon coating. It would make it easier for us to make decisions. All the advice that was adding confusion and filling our minds with "what ifs" would slide off.
You need to ask questions of your doctor. This will give you the best starting place to create the "game plan" best suited for you. In the beginning you may not even know which questions to ask. On the left are LINKS to various cancer sites. Many have a list of questions to get you started.
Have confidence in your decisions. It is your life. It is okay if you want to be your own armchair quarterback. It is great to learn from experience what works best and what doesn't. Afterall when we know more we do better.
Every person is unique. Every situation is unique. It is your life. You don't have to make decisions based on a general consensus. You are the majority. You rule!
Sunday
Risk of infection.
The risk of infection during your cancer treatment is very high. You want to avoid crowds, use disinfectant and talk to your doctor and nurses about ways to reduce the risk of infection. Infections can delay your treatment. You need to do everything you can to stay healthy and strong. You need to be actively involved in getting yourself healthy. Some things will be out of your control. Your immune system is weakened. It is important that you eliminate unnecessary risks that may make you subject to catching a cold, getting a cut or scratch, or infection of any kind.
If you should develop an infection, let your doctor know right away. You don't want to self diagnose your symptoms or take or apply medications without consulting your doctor. You need to make sure they don't conflict with your cancer treatment. Be cautious, don't assume you know what to do.
Be vigilant and careful. Make yourself a priority.
If you should develop an infection, let your doctor know right away. You don't want to self diagnose your symptoms or take or apply medications without consulting your doctor. You need to make sure they don't conflict with your cancer treatment. Be cautious, don't assume you know what to do.
Be vigilant and careful. Make yourself a priority.
Friday
The secret ingredient - hope. Who would guess that a song called "You Had A Bad Day" would be hopeful...LOL
I love this song because at one time or another I have heard my grandchildren singing it in a car. I love to go on a drive when I am feeling low. It magically turns my day around. Too many times to count I have heard this song playing during times when I was feeling low or in an anxious situation such as a doctor's office. Each time I smiled. I remembered Hope and Noah singing it in Tennessee or Jake singing it when I was visiting him in West Virginia as we awaited the arrival of his brother, Jonah to be born.
Music can fill us with hope and stir up memories. I hope you enjoy this. What songs bring you happiness and make you smile?
Music can fill us with hope and stir up memories. I hope you enjoy this. What songs bring you happiness and make you smile?
Thursday
Dare to be happy
"Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have a friend who makes you laugh spend lots and lots of time with them." Unknown
"Recall as often as you wish. Happy memories never wear out." Libby Fudim
Don't just live the length of your life - fill it up.
"Recall as often as you wish. Happy memories never wear out." Libby Fudim
Don't just live the length of your life - fill it up.
Sunday
The wisdom of Larry the Cable Guy!
The other evening I was channel surfing and stopped for a moment on the comedy station. Larry the Cable Guy was describing the handicapped stalls in public restrooms as the Cadillac of bathroom stalls. I started laughing in total agreement but for a reason that was different than his.
First and foremost let me make it clear I never park in a handicap spot. I would never use a handicap stall without first checking the vicinity to make sure there isn't a lady that might be coming in right behind me that would need it. In fact, I have only recently discovered the true value of this stall.
As I mentioned in an earlier post, I wear a wig. Hair loss was a side effect of my chemo. I live in Florida. It is hot here and we specialize in humidity. Consequently, my head gets hot. The heat from my body seems to go straight up and gets locked under my wig. My head sweats.
The handicapped stall in most public restrooms is larger and has its own sink and mirror. I can go in there and privately remove my wig, wipe off my head and reposition my wig back on my head. Fantastic! Now that makes it the Cadillac of bathroom stalls for me.
Chemo Side Effects
Every person's side effects from chemo are different. I experienced some unexpected really great days and some that I am truly grateful are in my rearview mirror. Sometimes my body reacted in ways that the doctor and nurses expected. Sometimes it surprised them with unpredicted allergic reactions. Your body is different. Your experience will be different. Instead of describing my personal side effects in detail, below are some general things I learned. Hopefully, you will find them helpful, maybe reassuring.
The one thing you can take comfort in, is that the side effects from chemo are NOT like they have so often been portrayed in movies. Thankfully, there are drugs and medical guidance that will help you avoid endless amounts of time with your head tilted over the toilet. Chances are you will experience nausea but it may not be as miserable as you may anticipate. Over time you will learn what tastes and smells exacerbate the situation so you can avoid them.
You may experience pain. Mine arrived a couple of days following my chemo. Originally, I thought I would tough it out and not take anything. I was wrong. I should have followed my nurses and doctors advice from the beginning instead of trying to be macho woman. By letting the pain accelerate and worsen it became extremely difficult for the pain pills to do their work. You need to follow you doctor's advice. In my case they told me to take a pill when the pain was a 3 on a scale of 1 to 10. Once I started doing that, I not only was able to manage my pain I needed less medication.
Expect a dip in your energy. Your body is working hard combating disease and it gets tired. You will feel fatigued. The last thing I felt like doing on the days when fatigue and pain were my companion, was exercise. As it turned out, I discovered that even 10 minutes on the treadmill actually gave me more energy and helped to lessen the pain. Thankfully, a friend loaned me his treadmill. Surprisingly it made a wonderful difference in both my mental and physical well being during the months of my chemo treatments. You don't have to walk on a treadmill. It is getting up and moving that makes the difference. It is hard to make yourself exercise when you don't feel good. We find excuses even when we are feeling tip-top. I hope you will try to do a little something on those low days. It will make a positive difference.
Just when you think you can predict what is going to happen, it will be different. It is easy to think that you know what to expect after you have experienced a couple of treatments and their side effects. Beware some effects may be accumulative and worsen with additional chemo. Some may disappear. You need to take each day as it comes and be candid with your doctor and nurses. They aren't members of Psychic Friends Network. They can't read your mind. You need to speak up and share what is happening and you need to listen and pay attention to their guidance.
There is much that is still unknown about cancer. There is much about it that we can't control.
One thing that each of us can control is our attitude. Maintaining a positive attitude, especially when facing life's challenges, can be difficult. I'm not suggesting you be a Polly Anna, happy go lucky person in the face of cancer. However remaining hopeful and believing in possibilities has proven to make a positive difference.
Never underestimate the power of your self-talk. Make sure you are as encouraging to yourself as you are to your friends and family.
Surround yourself with positive energy from family and friends. No drama, no "you poor thing" you need happy, hopeful vibes in your life.
You will no doubt learn much as you experience your own journey through your chemo treatments. I hope all goes well for you.
The one thing you can take comfort in, is that the side effects from chemo are NOT like they have so often been portrayed in movies. Thankfully, there are drugs and medical guidance that will help you avoid endless amounts of time with your head tilted over the toilet. Chances are you will experience nausea but it may not be as miserable as you may anticipate. Over time you will learn what tastes and smells exacerbate the situation so you can avoid them.
You may experience pain. Mine arrived a couple of days following my chemo. Originally, I thought I would tough it out and not take anything. I was wrong. I should have followed my nurses and doctors advice from the beginning instead of trying to be macho woman. By letting the pain accelerate and worsen it became extremely difficult for the pain pills to do their work. You need to follow you doctor's advice. In my case they told me to take a pill when the pain was a 3 on a scale of 1 to 10. Once I started doing that, I not only was able to manage my pain I needed less medication.
Expect a dip in your energy. Your body is working hard combating disease and it gets tired. You will feel fatigued. The last thing I felt like doing on the days when fatigue and pain were my companion, was exercise. As it turned out, I discovered that even 10 minutes on the treadmill actually gave me more energy and helped to lessen the pain. Thankfully, a friend loaned me his treadmill. Surprisingly it made a wonderful difference in both my mental and physical well being during the months of my chemo treatments. You don't have to walk on a treadmill. It is getting up and moving that makes the difference. It is hard to make yourself exercise when you don't feel good. We find excuses even when we are feeling tip-top. I hope you will try to do a little something on those low days. It will make a positive difference.
Just when you think you can predict what is going to happen, it will be different. It is easy to think that you know what to expect after you have experienced a couple of treatments and their side effects. Beware some effects may be accumulative and worsen with additional chemo. Some may disappear. You need to take each day as it comes and be candid with your doctor and nurses. They aren't members of Psychic Friends Network. They can't read your mind. You need to speak up and share what is happening and you need to listen and pay attention to their guidance.
There is much that is still unknown about cancer. There is much about it that we can't control.
One thing that each of us can control is our attitude. Maintaining a positive attitude, especially when facing life's challenges, can be difficult. I'm not suggesting you be a Polly Anna, happy go lucky person in the face of cancer. However remaining hopeful and believing in possibilities has proven to make a positive difference.
Never underestimate the power of your self-talk. Make sure you are as encouraging to yourself as you are to your friends and family.
Surround yourself with positive energy from family and friends. No drama, no "you poor thing" you need happy, hopeful vibes in your life.
You will no doubt learn much as you experience your own journey through your chemo treatments. I hope all goes well for you.
Saturday
Wishing you a fantastic day with time for mischief and fun.
We endure various treatments hoping to eliminate cancer and give us the opportunity to live longer, to have more days. It is important to enjoy each day we have. There is no need to wait until "after" to include joy and fun in your life.
Friday
Some of the things I have learned so far.
You are better informed on what to do if you catch on fire: stop, drop and roll then what to do if you are having chemo.
It's highly unlikely you will ever catch on fire. Yet we are taught how to deal with this and other worst case scenarios so we won't freeze up when disaster strikes. We hope that it will be equally unlikely that you will ever have to experience chemo.
When it comes to health issues we tend to learn about our bodies on a need to know basis. We expect our hearts to pump blood, our lungs to give us breath, our eyes to see, our mouths to talk, our bodies to move, etc., etc. We take our body's functioning for granted until something out of the ordinary happens to us or someone we know. It is then that we investigate and learn.
I have learned much during my chemo treatments. Some things seemed to be common sense. Duh! I should have known that. Some things totally surprised me. I am still bewildered by others.
Here are some of the things I've learned so far. I still have much to learn. Perhaps none will apply to your circumstance. Maybe some will. Check with your doctor. The American Cancer Society is an excellent resource.
While taking chemo it is best to stay away from salad bars and buffets. Your immune system is weakened. You can't be sure if the greens have been thoroughly washed. Someone who has visited the buffet may have been sick.
Avoid smoke. Don't smoke.
Stay out of the direct sunlight and heat as your skin is super sensitive. Wear SPF 30or 50 under your clothes. Long sleeves and long pants only give approximate SPF 3 coverage.
Be careful what you eat. Your digestion may be screwed up.
Be prepared for increased fatigue. Exercise may help with both energy and reducing pain.
Listen to your doctors and nurses when they advise you how to handle your pain.
Avoid chlorine water.
Avoid crowds, remember your immune system is weakened.
Don't drink green tea or take vitamins. Chemo kills the fast growing cells, both the good ones and cancer. The green tea and supplements counteract the effectiveness of the chemo.
Drink lots of fluids. G2 is excellent and comes in assorted flavors.
Avoid alcohol even in things like mouthwash etc.
Keep your skin warm so your veins will be more cooperative to accept the chemo.
Follow directions for caring for your port.
Avoid going to get a professional manicure or pedicure. If you go, be sure to take your own tools so you can avoid the risk of infection.
Expect that the medication and pain pills may clog your system and make you irregular, constipated or diarrhea. Miralax is a gentle help for constipation.
Eat plenty of protein and try to maintain a healthy weight no sudden losses or gains.
Keep a positive attitude.
Let others help you when you need it.
Talk to your doctor before going to the dentist.
Be prepared for your internal thermostat to be whacky. Hot then cold for no explainable reason.
Your taste of things may be metallic or just awful. Experiment. Maybe plastic silver ware will help.
Avoid caffeine.
You will be more sensitive to smells.
Use a soft toothbrush.
Avoid aspirin and blood thinners.
Don't get professional massages during this time. It could create blood clots. Also avoid crossing your legs.
Be careful around animals. Don't clean litter boxes, pick up dog waste, clean bird cages or fish tanks.
Wash raw foods thoroughly before eating.
If your hair is going to fall out consider getting a wig before it does. Not all chemo has this side effect. Check with your doctor.
Frozen peas and ice on sore joints help relieve pain.
Popsicles and sherbet help with sore throats.
Be candid with your doctor and nurses. Ask questions and let them know how you are doing. Let your doctor know immediately if you notice any tingling or numbness.
It's highly unlikely you will ever catch on fire. Yet we are taught how to deal with this and other worst case scenarios so we won't freeze up when disaster strikes. We hope that it will be equally unlikely that you will ever have to experience chemo.
When it comes to health issues we tend to learn about our bodies on a need to know basis. We expect our hearts to pump blood, our lungs to give us breath, our eyes to see, our mouths to talk, our bodies to move, etc., etc. We take our body's functioning for granted until something out of the ordinary happens to us or someone we know. It is then that we investigate and learn.
I have learned much during my chemo treatments. Some things seemed to be common sense. Duh! I should have known that. Some things totally surprised me. I am still bewildered by others.
Here are some of the things I've learned so far. I still have much to learn. Perhaps none will apply to your circumstance. Maybe some will. Check with your doctor. The American Cancer Society is an excellent resource.
While taking chemo it is best to stay away from salad bars and buffets. Your immune system is weakened. You can't be sure if the greens have been thoroughly washed. Someone who has visited the buffet may have been sick.
Avoid smoke. Don't smoke.
Stay out of the direct sunlight and heat as your skin is super sensitive. Wear SPF 30or 50 under your clothes. Long sleeves and long pants only give approximate SPF 3 coverage.
Be careful what you eat. Your digestion may be screwed up.
Be prepared for increased fatigue. Exercise may help with both energy and reducing pain.
Listen to your doctors and nurses when they advise you how to handle your pain.
Avoid chlorine water.
Avoid crowds, remember your immune system is weakened.
Don't drink green tea or take vitamins. Chemo kills the fast growing cells, both the good ones and cancer. The green tea and supplements counteract the effectiveness of the chemo.
Drink lots of fluids. G2 is excellent and comes in assorted flavors.
Avoid alcohol even in things like mouthwash etc.
Keep your skin warm so your veins will be more cooperative to accept the chemo.
Follow directions for caring for your port.
Avoid going to get a professional manicure or pedicure. If you go, be sure to take your own tools so you can avoid the risk of infection.
Expect that the medication and pain pills may clog your system and make you irregular, constipated or diarrhea. Miralax is a gentle help for constipation.
Eat plenty of protein and try to maintain a healthy weight no sudden losses or gains.
Keep a positive attitude.
Let others help you when you need it.
Talk to your doctor before going to the dentist.
Be prepared for your internal thermostat to be whacky. Hot then cold for no explainable reason.
Your taste of things may be metallic or just awful. Experiment. Maybe plastic silver ware will help.
Avoid caffeine.
You will be more sensitive to smells.
Use a soft toothbrush.
Avoid aspirin and blood thinners.
Don't get professional massages during this time. It could create blood clots. Also avoid crossing your legs.
Be careful around animals. Don't clean litter boxes, pick up dog waste, clean bird cages or fish tanks.
Wash raw foods thoroughly before eating.
If your hair is going to fall out consider getting a wig before it does. Not all chemo has this side effect. Check with your doctor.
Frozen peas and ice on sore joints help relieve pain.
Popsicles and sherbet help with sore throats.
Be candid with your doctor and nurses. Ask questions and let them know how you are doing. Let your doctor know immediately if you notice any tingling or numbness.
My First Chemo Treatment
I'd asked questions, researched online but I still wasn't sure what to expect. Thankfully my nurses, Beth and Jackie were awesome. They had told me that my treatment would last about 7 to 8 hours. They told me to bring a snack and a drink.
They had taken time during my initial visit to give me an overview of what to expect.
Still when the day came, I was very nervous. My blood pressure went sky high. Beth suggested yoga breathing and after 10 minutes my pressure started to go back down. I was fortunate that all my chemo treatments were given in a room adjacent to my doctor's office and examination rooms. Only ladies were receiving chemo. I wasn't witnessing children and others getting their treatments. That would have been even more emotional for me.
I was able to receive the chemo via my veins. I had hoped that would be the case. I didn't want to have a port if possible. Thankfully, there are a variety of options to receive the chemo. The day I started treatment, some ladies had ports, some were getting it in their stomach area. Happily they were able to thread the IV needle into the vein on my right wrist.
As instructed, I'd drunk lots of fluids during the days prior to my treatment. That combined with the IV fluid that was being put into my body made it necessary to go to the bathroom. The nurses showed me how to carefully roll the rack with the IV bags into the restroom. Graceful I wasn't. Thankfully I never fell.
Most of the other ladies in the room receiving chemo fell asleep. Beth and Jackie thought for sure I would fall asleep too. Benedryl was being pumped into my system to help ward off any allergic reactions. I never fell asleep. I was too curious and anxious. I didn't want to miss anything that was happening.
On day one of my chemo, I met 2 ladies who were getting their final treatments. It made me feel hopeful.
Some of the ladies came daily for chemo. Some came several times a week and others had treatments that were shorter than mine. It was a reminder that there are different chemo "cocktails" and treatment schedules based on various cancers, stages and individuals. Another reason that although it is okay to share you are cautioned not to compare circumstances.
In the late afternoon, as the 2 ladies were "graduating chemo," I heard another lady speak up and say, "Enjoy it while you can. Chances are you will be back here in 3 months. This is my third round."
My heart sank. Around 4PM I was done with my first treatment. All the other patients had left. Jackie took time to tell me what to expect over the next several days and weeks. She said I should call them if I had any questions or if I felt any tingling or numbness.
As I stood and was about to leave, my eyes flooded with tears. Jackie sat me back down. She read my mind. "You think chemo means you are going to die," she said. She was right. That was exactly what I was thinking.
I had only known 2 people who had gone through chemo in the last few years. Both of them had died. I was equally concerned by what the other woman had said to the 2 ladies that had "graduated". As much as I want to live longer, I care about my quality of life. Her words had frightened me.
Jackie took time to talk with me. She explained that the woman in question had a totally different cancer and it was at a different stage. She reassured me. She and Beth emphasized that the positive attitude I'd shown so far was what I needed to maintain. They said there would be down times when I felt worn out, in pain and depressed. That was to be expected.
They said staying positive, following doctors directions and calling them if anything unusual or unexpected happened was important. I left feeling good. I believed I needed to remain hopeful so I could make a positive contribution as we move forward to save my own life.
You need to realize that not only will you be facing physical challenges as you move forward with your treatments but emotional challenges as well.
They had taken time during my initial visit to give me an overview of what to expect.
Still when the day came, I was very nervous. My blood pressure went sky high. Beth suggested yoga breathing and after 10 minutes my pressure started to go back down. I was fortunate that all my chemo treatments were given in a room adjacent to my doctor's office and examination rooms. Only ladies were receiving chemo. I wasn't witnessing children and others getting their treatments. That would have been even more emotional for me.
I was able to receive the chemo via my veins. I had hoped that would be the case. I didn't want to have a port if possible. Thankfully, there are a variety of options to receive the chemo. The day I started treatment, some ladies had ports, some were getting it in their stomach area. Happily they were able to thread the IV needle into the vein on my right wrist.
As instructed, I'd drunk lots of fluids during the days prior to my treatment. That combined with the IV fluid that was being put into my body made it necessary to go to the bathroom. The nurses showed me how to carefully roll the rack with the IV bags into the restroom. Graceful I wasn't. Thankfully I never fell.
Most of the other ladies in the room receiving chemo fell asleep. Beth and Jackie thought for sure I would fall asleep too. Benedryl was being pumped into my system to help ward off any allergic reactions. I never fell asleep. I was too curious and anxious. I didn't want to miss anything that was happening.
On day one of my chemo, I met 2 ladies who were getting their final treatments. It made me feel hopeful.
Some of the ladies came daily for chemo. Some came several times a week and others had treatments that were shorter than mine. It was a reminder that there are different chemo "cocktails" and treatment schedules based on various cancers, stages and individuals. Another reason that although it is okay to share you are cautioned not to compare circumstances.
In the late afternoon, as the 2 ladies were "graduating chemo," I heard another lady speak up and say, "Enjoy it while you can. Chances are you will be back here in 3 months. This is my third round."
My heart sank. Around 4PM I was done with my first treatment. All the other patients had left. Jackie took time to tell me what to expect over the next several days and weeks. She said I should call them if I had any questions or if I felt any tingling or numbness.
As I stood and was about to leave, my eyes flooded with tears. Jackie sat me back down. She read my mind. "You think chemo means you are going to die," she said. She was right. That was exactly what I was thinking.
I had only known 2 people who had gone through chemo in the last few years. Both of them had died. I was equally concerned by what the other woman had said to the 2 ladies that had "graduated". As much as I want to live longer, I care about my quality of life. Her words had frightened me.
Jackie took time to talk with me. She explained that the woman in question had a totally different cancer and it was at a different stage. She reassured me. She and Beth emphasized that the positive attitude I'd shown so far was what I needed to maintain. They said there would be down times when I felt worn out, in pain and depressed. That was to be expected.
They said staying positive, following doctors directions and calling them if anything unusual or unexpected happened was important. I left feeling good. I believed I needed to remain hopeful so I could make a positive contribution as we move forward to save my own life.
You need to realize that not only will you be facing physical challenges as you move forward with your treatments but emotional challenges as well.
Thursday
Wednesday
The Ultimate Bad Hair Day
I thought I'd experienced bad hair days until I was told my hair was going to fall out. Hearing it is one thing, the reality is something else.
Important Note: Not all chemo causes hair loss!
I loved having long hair. It made me feel younger. So many woman get to a "certain age" and get their hair cut super short with a permanent of tight curls. Both my Nana's wore their hair that way. I convinced myself that long hair equalled youth. Of course, that is nonsense but then alot of my logic is considered a little crazy.
At the time I was told I would need chemo my hair was long, longer than it had ever been.
I guess I should share with you that I never expected chemo was going to be necessary. I thought the surgery would eliminate all the cancer and this life challenge would be in my rearview mirror. More of my "mzdavinci logic."
In fact, the day the doctor told me I would have to have chemo as a follow-up to my surgery, I went through all the activities of the day in a daze. Even now thinking back on it, it seems like a slow motion movie.
When I met with the chemo nurses to learn about my schedule and procedure, they explained that this particular "cocktail" would make my hair fall out. They said that it would start to fall out about 2 weeks after the first treatment.
Let me reiterate, not all chemo treatments result in hair loss. Every person, every situation is uniquely different.
The nurses suggested that I get a wig before my hair fell out. They also said it would hurt. Bald men never complain that losing their hair hurt. I had men friends who had lost their hair and never complained. It sounded ridiculous.
Let me assure you now they were right. Something less than terrific goes on with the hair follicles on your head thanks to chemo and your hair does hurt. Very strange but true.
The Saturday before my first chemo treatment, I went to a salon and had my hair cut and donated to locks of love. It made the whole process of losing my hair feel worthwhile. To find more information about Locks of Love go to www.locksoflove.org
Having my hair short for a couple of weeks helped me get used to the idea.
The nurses advice was helpful.
I knew I didn't want to be standing in the shower and watch my hair tumble off my head down to the drain. Once my scalp started to tingle and my hair hurt and started to come out in my brush I went to buy a wig.
The clerks that helped me select one were kind and encouraging. They offered to take me into a private area and shave my head so this ordeal would be over. I said yes.
Even now I can't say I enjoy wearing a wig. It is hot and I miss my hair. I admire those women who go out in public with their heads bald or wear a scarf or hat. I'm more comfortable wearing a wig. Everyone needs to do what makes them feel best. You need to do whatever you makes you most comfortable and at ease.
Surprise! When they say you will lose your hair they don't mean only on top of your head. They mean ALL your hair will fall out. It just didn't click that I would lose hair everywhere!
Losing my eyebrows and eyelashes has been the most emotional consequence of hair loss for me. It feels as though I have lost expression. I've tried to apply false eyelashes and pencil in some eyebrows. Apparently, these aren't where my talents lie. It looked like a caterpillar died on my eyelid and the attempt at eyebrows was a total disaster. I wish you more success.
Thank goodness here in Florida wearing sunglasses everywhere doesn't seem too out of place.
Important Note: Not all chemo causes hair loss!
I loved having long hair. It made me feel younger. So many woman get to a "certain age" and get their hair cut super short with a permanent of tight curls. Both my Nana's wore their hair that way. I convinced myself that long hair equalled youth. Of course, that is nonsense but then alot of my logic is considered a little crazy.
At the time I was told I would need chemo my hair was long, longer than it had ever been.
I guess I should share with you that I never expected chemo was going to be necessary. I thought the surgery would eliminate all the cancer and this life challenge would be in my rearview mirror. More of my "mzdavinci logic."
In fact, the day the doctor told me I would have to have chemo as a follow-up to my surgery, I went through all the activities of the day in a daze. Even now thinking back on it, it seems like a slow motion movie.
When I met with the chemo nurses to learn about my schedule and procedure, they explained that this particular "cocktail" would make my hair fall out. They said that it would start to fall out about 2 weeks after the first treatment.
Let me reiterate, not all chemo treatments result in hair loss. Every person, every situation is uniquely different.
The nurses suggested that I get a wig before my hair fell out. They also said it would hurt. Bald men never complain that losing their hair hurt. I had men friends who had lost their hair and never complained. It sounded ridiculous.
Let me assure you now they were right. Something less than terrific goes on with the hair follicles on your head thanks to chemo and your hair does hurt. Very strange but true.
The Saturday before my first chemo treatment, I went to a salon and had my hair cut and donated to locks of love. It made the whole process of losing my hair feel worthwhile. To find more information about Locks of Love go to www.locksoflove.org
Having my hair short for a couple of weeks helped me get used to the idea.
The nurses advice was helpful.
I knew I didn't want to be standing in the shower and watch my hair tumble off my head down to the drain. Once my scalp started to tingle and my hair hurt and started to come out in my brush I went to buy a wig.
The clerks that helped me select one were kind and encouraging. They offered to take me into a private area and shave my head so this ordeal would be over. I said yes.
Even now I can't say I enjoy wearing a wig. It is hot and I miss my hair. I admire those women who go out in public with their heads bald or wear a scarf or hat. I'm more comfortable wearing a wig. Everyone needs to do what makes them feel best. You need to do whatever you makes you most comfortable and at ease.
Surprise! When they say you will lose your hair they don't mean only on top of your head. They mean ALL your hair will fall out. It just didn't click that I would lose hair everywhere!
Losing my eyebrows and eyelashes has been the most emotional consequence of hair loss for me. It feels as though I have lost expression. I've tried to apply false eyelashes and pencil in some eyebrows. Apparently, these aren't where my talents lie. It looked like a caterpillar died on my eyelid and the attempt at eyebrows was a total disaster. I wish you more success.
Thank goodness here in Florida wearing sunglasses everywhere doesn't seem too out of place.
Tuesday
Lucky me!
No doubt it is strange to title a section "Lucky me!" Cancer has never been on my to do or wish list, heaven's no. I'm grateful that this frightening, debilitating, nightmare of a disease has happened to me and not to someone else in my family.
I've had friends who have lost their struggle to beat cancer. My parents each died from it.
I know from first-hand experience it is easier to be the one faced with the challenge. It is much more heart wrenching and difficult to feel helpless wanting so very much to make things better for someone else.
When my dad was diagnosed with prostrate cancer he went through a series of emotions; fear, disbelief, the why me syndrome and overwhelming concern about what would this mean for my mom and our family.
A week or so after receiving the news, I was visiting my parents in Tennessee. It was the wee small hours and I was sitting in their livingroom unable to sleep. (A common side effect of being nocturnal and having insomnia.) My dad came out of his room and headed to the kitchen his whole demeanor had changed. I asked him if he was okay. He said he was great.
"Great?" I asked. "Yes," he said. "I realize I was given a great gift. Everyone is going to die sometime. This diagnosis is my wake-up call to treasure and live each day. The doctor is human. He can't tell whether I will live 2 years or get hit with a bus tomorrow. There is no expiration label on me."
We hugged, we smiled. We watched some crazy show on TV and went to bed. Each of our lives were forever changed. My dad went on to live 9 more terrific years and I have done my best to treasure and live each day as though it might be my last.
Sharing that moment in the wee small hours with my dad helped me to see my own diagnosis so many years later as my own gift. A reminder that I need to continue to treasure and live each day. They call it the present because it truly is a gift.
If you have managed to read this long reamble then please do yourself a favor. Take off all your clothes and inspect your naked body. Look everywhere. You won't find an expiration label. There isn't one. No one knows when our time is going to be up.
Don't let anyone or any circumstances label you. May you find joy in your day and strength when it is tough. May you remain curious as to what tomorrow will bring. Don't give up! You are uniquely special and worthy of happiness.
You may surprise yourself someday when you hear yourself say, "Lucky me!"
I've had friends who have lost their struggle to beat cancer. My parents each died from it.
I know from first-hand experience it is easier to be the one faced with the challenge. It is much more heart wrenching and difficult to feel helpless wanting so very much to make things better for someone else.
When my dad was diagnosed with prostrate cancer he went through a series of emotions; fear, disbelief, the why me syndrome and overwhelming concern about what would this mean for my mom and our family.
A week or so after receiving the news, I was visiting my parents in Tennessee. It was the wee small hours and I was sitting in their livingroom unable to sleep. (A common side effect of being nocturnal and having insomnia.) My dad came out of his room and headed to the kitchen his whole demeanor had changed. I asked him if he was okay. He said he was great.
"Great?" I asked. "Yes," he said. "I realize I was given a great gift. Everyone is going to die sometime. This diagnosis is my wake-up call to treasure and live each day. The doctor is human. He can't tell whether I will live 2 years or get hit with a bus tomorrow. There is no expiration label on me."
We hugged, we smiled. We watched some crazy show on TV and went to bed. Each of our lives were forever changed. My dad went on to live 9 more terrific years and I have done my best to treasure and live each day as though it might be my last.
Sharing that moment in the wee small hours with my dad helped me to see my own diagnosis so many years later as my own gift. A reminder that I need to continue to treasure and live each day. They call it the present because it truly is a gift.
If you have managed to read this long reamble then please do yourself a favor. Take off all your clothes and inspect your naked body. Look everywhere. You won't find an expiration label. There isn't one. No one knows when our time is going to be up.
Don't let anyone or any circumstances label you. May you find joy in your day and strength when it is tough. May you remain curious as to what tomorrow will bring. Don't give up! You are uniquely special and worthy of happiness.
You may surprise yourself someday when you hear yourself say, "Lucky me!"
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